Devil May Cry: Akuma's Love Misadventures
by raidouXVI
Summary: Living his life to the fullest, Yuuki Rito enjoys his peaceful life, despite having disastrous failures in his love life. However, on one fateful night, an alien princess suddenly appears in his bathtub! Knowing that things coming from outer space is nothing but trouble, will Rito be able keep enjoying his peaceful life? Will he stay sane? Will his love life succeed? Find out!


_**Author's note: Hello there, dear readers! Welcome to Devil May Cry: Akuma's Love misadventures, A re-written version of Akuma meets Aliens by chaosthesith89. With permission from him, I was allowed to do this re-write. And I would like to thank him for that. **_

_**Disclaimer:The original story concept of this fanfic belongs to chaosthesith89. And both To Love-Ru and Devil May Cry belongs to their respective owners.**_

_**And with that, let's start!**_

_**Devil May Cry: Akuma's Love Misadventures**_

_**Chapter 1: I fail my confession, and meet a naked alien at my bathtub? Where did I go wrong?!**_

_Location: Sainan High, School gates_

_Time: After School_

_3__rd__ Person POV_

"Alright, buckle up, Yuuki Rito! Fail this time, and say good bye to your genetics!"

A 16 year old boy who calls himself Rito boosts his confidence behind a large sakura tree, carrying a love letter. He has spiky white hair, deep blue eyes, a normal complexion, and average height. He wears the school's uniform, which is a white polo shirt, with checkered pants.

From the other side of the tree, is the entrance of the school. And there was a person waiting beside one of the gates. It was a girl. She has long black hair, reaching her waist. She also has dark brown eyes, which gave off a strict atmosphere. But her most noticeable feature is her well-endowed body…

"Here I come, Kotegawa Yui-san!" Rito declares as he begins moving. But as soon as he saw Yui, his body is suddenly filled with great nervousness, and as if it was not enough, his shyness caused his right leg to get cramps, making him stuck behind the sakura tree as the pain from his right leg prevented his movement…

It's as if the goddess of fate really hates his guts.

"Damn it, of all times! But I…can't…fail…again…" Rito tries pushing himself to the side of the tree, only to see that that Kotegawa is already leaving with two more students, one he does not know, and the other one he knows as Sairenji Haruna.

Rito, having no choice, hides and retreats once again. This was about the 27th time he failed to confess…again.

"_Fukou da…(Such misfortune.)_"

Rito was about to bang his head on the tree, but was stopped by a greeting from behind him.

"Yo! What's up, Rito?" A boy with spiky black hair, black colored eyes, and wearing the same school uniform appears. On his ID is written 'Saruyama Kenichi'.

"Ah, Kenichi, nice timing." Rito then beckons Kenichi to come closer, "Mind helping me out here? My right leg's cramped…again."

"Oh really? Again?" Saruyama asks, only for Rito to wordlessly nod. Kenichi then proceeds to help Rito by carrying him by the shoulder, "Looks like we've got a lot to talk about eh? Wanna go for the maid café again? It's on the house! This is, like, your 28th attempt, after all." Kenichi tells Rito, only to be corrected by him as they walk, "This is my 27th, dumbass."

"Ah whatever." Kenichi replies, and the two of them proceeded to walk silently, straight into a maid café in the middle of the city. The café is named 'Stray Cats'.

_Location: Stray Cats Café_

_Time: Late Afternoon_

_3__rd__ Person POV_

"…Seriously? Nervous-induced leg cramps, as usual?" Kenichi comments after Rito tells his story, "Dude, why not go after those chicks who actually ran after you? Haruna-chan's really making herself obvious, you know?" Kenichi recommends to Rito, only to be brushed off, "But I…am not really into her type." As Rito kept speaking, he keeps a straight face, "And besides, I only like women with strong will and conviction. The type that does not base on your looks or outside appearance. You know, the kind of chick that actually resists."

Saruyama then adds, "Like Kotegawa-san you mean? That's…quite high, dude. Now I see why you always have leg cramps when she's around. But didn't you hear the rumors?" Rito raised an eyebrow at this, and got interested, causing him to ask, "What rumors?"

"That she's the man-hater type. Which is why she got chosen as the school council president. I mean, look at our school principal. Anyone who discovers that he's a principal will absolutely lose their fate in humanity." Saruyama answers, but yet again, Rito brushes it off.

"Excuse me sir," A maid interrupts the boy-talk, "Here are your banana split and strawberry sundae." The maid then passes the banana split to Kenichi, and the sundae to Rito. She then bows and leaves their table.

"The maids are so…cute as usual. Ehehehe…" Kenichi drools at the maids around the café, while Rito just ignored him and started eating his strawberry sundae...

_Location: Sainan Residential area_

_Time: Evening_

"Well, see ya tomorrow, buddy!" Kenichi waves at Rito as he says this, and walks to the direction of his home. Rito then proceeds to go home as well.

While walking around, he takes a look at the sky. As if on cue, a shooting passed through.

"Whoa, seriously? Time to make a wish then!" Rito then puts hands in a prayer like formation, "I wish…to have a tender-loving waifu! And I won't even care where she came from!" Rito then just kept on walking after that, while remarking that wishes upon a star are just fairy tales…

However, as they say, be careful what you wish for…

And he doesn't even believe in it.

_Location: Yuuki Residence_

_Time: Evening_

"I'm home!" Rito energetically declares as he enters the house.

"Ah, Rito. Welcome back." His younger sister, Yuuki Mikan, greets him as he passes through the kitchen. She appears to be making dinner.

"So, is dad gonna stay at his apartment again?" Rito asks Mikan about their father's whereabouts. She casually answers, "Yeah. He's really hell bent on finishing before his deadlines. So he's working extra hard right now." Rito then just nods, and proceeds to his room.

Seeing the tired look on her brother's eyes, she just ignores him. 'He probably screwed up something as usual…Nevermind.' Mikan dismisses her thoughts as she kept on preparing dinner…

_Location: Rito's bathroom_

_Time: Evening_

"Ahhh…Nothing really beats a bath after a confession day!" Rito declares as he relaxes to the comfort of the hot bath, "But then again, every day IS confession day…" Rito quickly washes his face, trying to forget what happened earlier today…

Rito was finally relaxed, and started to fall asleep inside the tub…

…When sparks of electricity danced around the tub, and on the next few seconds…

*BOOM!*

The water in the bathtub exploded, making a small but quick rain falls around the bathroom!

"What in the?!" Rito wakes up to the explosion, "…Was that supposed to be my fart?"

"Succesfully escaped!" A girl's voice rang in front of Rito. He rubs his eyes, finds before him…

"Holy sh*t!"

A beautiful girl with the body of a goddess! She has shiny pink hair, emerald green eyes, and a shiny fair skin. Her every feature can set any man's 'sword of Sparda' sky rocketing!

Rito got so absorbed in her body and beauty that he too, forgot he was naked.

Is luck smiling on him today?!

"What's wrong, Rito?!" Mikan suddenly rushes in, after hearing her brother scream from earlier.

"Uhhh…I fell asleep?" Rito tries to explain, forgetting the fact that he does not wear anything right now…

Mikan, out of instinct, unconsciously darts her eyes towards Rito's crotch area…

"Oho? And where do you think you're looking at?" After seeing her so shocked, Rito uses the opportunity to tease Mikan, "Don't tell me that you're still wanting a bath with _onee-chan_?"

The last part snaps Mikan out of her trance, and causes her to storm out of the bathroom, before shouting, "Put some covers on, you damn pervert! _Onee-chan no ecchi!_" Despite being called a pervert, Rito still smiled at the fact that Mikan still called him big brother…

"Alright, now that she's gone, you can come out of the water now. I wouldn't want a floating corpse of a beauty in my tub, you know." Rito says as he taps the water, causing the pink headed girl from earlier to pop out of the tub…

She was about to talk, when Rito suddenly interrupted her, "I'd love to listen to your story, but, can I put some pants on first? I don't know about where you came from, but here in my place, we put on some clothes before talking to strangers. I have some extra clothes too, so you can borrow them." The pinkette smiled at Rito after he said this, causing him to blush.

He then quickly grabs her hand, and takes her to his room…

_Location: Rito's room_

As soon as both of them were dressed properly, the girl then explains her situation to Rito.

And from Rito's perspective, here is what he understands:

'Her name is Lala Satalin Deviluke. She claims to be from another planet. She says that she ran away because her father would call upon suitors from different planets and galaxies. And so far, Lala liked NONE of them. So she decided to run away using one of her inventions, which she calls 'PyonPyon warp-kun'. But as a side-effect during warpings, she landed on my bath tub…Oh, and she's being chased too.'

"So, uhhh…You're an alien?" Rito confirms, though he doesn't believe.

"Yep!" Lala responds in a cheerful tone. Rito, however, had a different reaction…

"Hahaha…You're funny you know that? And do you know where they put funny people? It's to the funny-place…Or in short, the asylum. And my name's Yuuki Rito, by the way." Lala suddenly looked crestfallen at Rito's comment, and retorted, "But I'm not crazy at all! Look!" She then turns back, removes the pajamas Rito lent her, showing a nice view of her behinds, causing Rito's little _Yamato _to _revolt upwards._

…But other than that, what shocked Rito…

…Was her demonic looking tail.

"You earthlings don't have tails, right?" Lala asks Rito, whose face looked so red you can cook eggs on it.

"Ok, ok, you have a tail and you're not crazy! But please, put on those pajamas!" Lala then does as he asked, and looked at his face, "Ehehehe."

"What's so funny?" Rito asks, still embarrassed.

"You're so cute when you blush…" Lala still stares at Rito's face, which became even redder.

"Wha-whatever." Rito retorts, while turning his face away from Lala. However this moment was interrupted by a robotic voice that came out of nowhere…

"**Lala-sama!**" A small robot crashes in through Rito's window. It is cream colored, and had bat wings to boot. "**Are you alright, Lala-sama**?"

"Who the hell's that?!" Rito backs off a bit from the robot…

"Peke! I'm so glad you're safe!" Lala hugs the robot-like…thing.

"**Luckily, the ship has not left the Earth's orbit.**" Peke then spots Rito beside Lala, who's still in shock, "**Lala-sama, who is this strange looking earthling**?"

Rito snaps out of shock after hearing that, and retorts, "What is this, the pot calling the kettle black? As if I'm the weird one here! At least I use the DOOR, not crashing through other people's windows!"

"**Ah, please forgive me.**" Peke then flies in front of Rito and bows as it said this.

"…It's alright. At least you've got the decency to apologize." Lala's face brightened at this, and declares, "You're so kind, Rito-kun!" This causes Rito's face to turn red, "Shu-shuddup!"

"Ehehehe." Lala seems to be enjoying her interaction as she kept teasing Rito for a good 30 minutes, while Peke repairs the broken window he crashed through earlier. And later, much to Rito's shock, Peke turned itself into Lala's clothes!

…However, this peaceful moment was interrupted, as a large light engulfed the room, and as the light faded, two men in black suits appeared. Both of them are in suits, with sunglasses. One of them had a scar along his left eye, and he has blond hair, while the other guy has black hair. One trait that Rito noticed between them is that they both have a tail, similar to Lala, but they have a different design.

Looking at them carefully, their appearance reminded Rito of a certain American movie, where the heros were a blond American and a Black American…in suits and glasses. With anti-alien plasma laser guns and all that scientific crap.

'What is this, men in black?" Rito mused as the blond one starts speaking…

"Your actions are becoming troublesome…We should have bound your arms and legs, and denied you freedom." As soon as the blond one said this, Lala had an expression of shock, which was replaced with annoyance as she looks at Peke. While Rito clenched his fists.

"Peke~" Lala calls out to her clothes…

"**Yes?**" The robot turned clothes responded.

"I thought I told you…That you must always make sure that you're not followed!" Lala scolds her costume, her tone becoming more angry, yet panicked at every passing second.

"**I'm so sorry…Lala-sama**" The costume apologizes sincerely…

The whole sight was making Rito think if he had been taking too much sugar this week…

"Now then, let us go. And do not resist this time, for your sake." The blond suddenly grabs Lala as he said this, dragging her in the process.

"No! I don't want to come back! Let me go!" Lala tries shaking off, but to no avail.

"**Lala-sama! Please use the bracelet!**" Peke tells Lala in a desperate tone.

"I can't! It's currently on cool down! It's gonna take us one day to use it again…" Lala sadly declares, seemingly losing hope…

However, someone suddenly grabbed the blond one's wrist, with a grip that's strong enough to stop him in his tracks. Lala, Peke, and the blondie turned to the source of the hand, and saw that it was Rito, who looks categorically unimpressed.

_BGM: Taste the Blood ~Vergil Version~_

Using this opportunity, Lala breaks free of the blond's grasp. The blond attempted to break free from Rito, only to receive a strong uppercut to the chin from Rito himself, sending the blond upwards, and getting his head stuck into the ceiling!

"Good night." Rito declares at the sight of the blond stuck to the ceiling. He turns to the blond's partner, and calls him in a taunting manner, "Come on."

The blond's partner quickly assaults Rito with a round house kick from Rito's left side, only for Rito to block the attack with his right hand. Rito then responds with a barrage of spear kicks from his left, with his kicks hitting the thug through the body, and Rito finishes the combo with a powerful Ax kick from his right foot, sending the thug face first to the ground, rendering him unconscious!

"Sweet dreams." Rito declares in a taunting manner to his fallen foe, and then, Rito looks at Lala, and grabbing her in the process, "Let's high tail outta here. I should at least make sure you're somewhere safe." And with that, Rito took out Lala through the window…

_~BGM Fades~_

_Location: Sainan Central Park_

_Time: Late night_

"This should be far enough…" Rito declares as he sits on a bench in the middle of the plaza, alongside Lala.

"Rito-kun…" Lala looks at Rito with a serious expression, "Why did you help me?"

Rito looks at her for a moment, and answers, "Well, what kind of gentleman am I if I'm going to leave a lady in trouble?" Lala looked impressed by this, and proceeds to rest herself.

However, two figures appeared in front of them, and hell be damned, it's the blond and his partner!

"That's as far as you go, princess!" The blond one declares, "And you, earthling, stop interfering!" The blond shouts at Rito.

"Aren't you guys rude? First you pop up in my room, and second, you attempted to kidnap my guest…" Rito says as he prepares himself, "Of course, it's my business now!"

However, Rito was ignored, and the blond just continues, "Lala-sama, please, stop this at once! Running away from your home is already problematic as it is!"

"No way!" Lala answers back, "I've had enough of it! All that I do every day is talking to people who wants to marry me! I don't care if it's because I'm the successor or something like that, but, I'm not some bargaining chip in marriage alliances!" Lala declares with a tone full of hatred, and loneliness.

"But Lala-sama," The blondie argues, "This is whatyour father wants…"

"Papa has nothing to do with this!" Lala declares back as she takes out something from her pocket and flips it open, like a cellphone. After pressing some buttons and hitting the central button,a flash of light occurs, and as it disappeared, a large, octopus like machine appeared in place of the light. "Go! Vacuum-kun!"

"…This is not good. At all." The blondie declares in fear, "It's one of Lala-sama's inventions!"

"Go!" Lala points at the two thugs, "Suck them up!" The machine then starts up, and createing high speed winds that sucked the two men off the ground, and towards the machine. In a few moments, the two men were sucked inside the vacuum…

"Oho, that's different." Rito declares as he watches, "A gigantic vacuum cleaner huh? The housewives are gonna love this kind of machinations!" Rito muses as the vacuum kept on sucking everything…non-stop…

…And pulling him off the ground, "Oi, oi, turn this off, Lala!" Rito scolds Lala, who puts a hand on her chin, as if trying to remember something…while floating beside her machine…

"**Lala-sama? What's wrong?**" Peke asks…

"Ah!..." Lala looked like she remembered something, but not what was needed, "…I forgot how to turn it off…"

"_**What?!**_" Rito exclaims, "Are you kidding me?!"

"I'm not…?" Lala answers, though unsure.

"Damn it!" Rito then looks at the machine, "I'm really against this…But, it's not like I have any other choice!" As he said that, he raises his left hand, and a flash of purple light engulfed Rito's body. As the light faded, a black O-katana is in his left hand, sheathed. The guard is oval, and the handle seems to be braided from white and black material. The blade features several intricate ornaments, most notable is a relief of a dragon at the endpoint of the hilt.

Rito then suddenly disappears in a blue blur. In a split second, a second blur passed through the octopus-like machine, and a third blur reveals Rito, on the ground, holding his sword, unsheated.

Rito then slowly sheathes his katana. When the handle hits the sheath with an audible 'clink', the octopus like machine suddenly stops moving, only for it to split in two directions, and explode.

"Foolishness, vacuum-san. Foolishness." Rito declares as he unsheathes his sword, spins it around for a bit, and sheathes it again in a stylish manner.

Lala and Peke watched the whole spectacle, their faces showed expressions of great shock. However, as Rito turn to face them, they quickly marched towards him.

As they came nearer, they noticed something…different from Rito. His atmosphere was…heavier. And his hair…It's swept back.

Rito then walks towards them, and says in a deep variation of his voice,

"Yo. What's with those faces?"

Peke then whispers to Lala, "**Is this what they meant by earthlings having growth spurts?**"

A vein plopped in Rito's forehead…

"I can hear you, you know."

_**And cliffhangers! I love this!**_

_**It's a little short, but I did this on purpose, since I don't usually make introductory chapters too long. But don't worry, chapter 2 is 45% done!**_

_**Please tell me your opinions on this one! A constructive cristicism is welcomed too!**_

_**Safety and peace, dear readers!**_


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